Once I started examining my labels, something very unexpected began to happen, I experienced deep emotional pain that led to healing and renewal…and it was most definitely, God at work.
I’ll never forget the day God began to chisel away at my pain as I sat in my first women’s bible study, “Seed”, about a year ago. I was there hoping to grow closer to God, but not realizing the process I was about to go through in order to know His truth for me. Our leader, Rachael, had a large mirror in the front of the room and she filled it with words that became her labels. These words weren’t good labels, like “beautiful” or “smart”, but rather labels containing negative connotations that she believed to be true at one time. She told us stories of how she got these labels, either by other’s words, actions, or her own thoughts throughout the years. I strongly related to some of her labels, and I was ready to write my own “false truths”. With my blue marker in hand and personal mirror in front of me, I began to reflect on what words I could write down, thinking all the way back to when I was a little girl. I quickly filled up the mirror with my labels:
Fearful, worrier, anxious, weak, dependent, adopted-child, fatherless, don’t belong, not accepted, failure, mistake, rejected, incapable, not enough, unhealthy child, UNWORTHY….OUCH!!
When I finished, I looked up and saw everyone else still writing. My leader quietly directed me to bring my marked-up mirror to the front of the room where there was a table covered in black cloth and a hammer. She instructed me to use the hammer to destroy my mirror, breaking me free from those labels. I instantly started swinging and the tears and uncontrollable waves of emotion came over me. I smashed it to pieces and couldn’t stop crying. Rachael took me aside and began comforting me. She asked if she could place her hands over me and began praying with words from my Heavenly Father….”Molly, you are my precious child, my beloved daughter, and I love you so much…..You are worthy!...”. My body began to be soothed with each word I heard from Rachael’s mouth. The Holy Spirit’s presence was vividly clear.
With that first deep cut God made on me that day, I began letting Him dig up all the false truths I’ve believed, so he could replace them with how He truly sees me. I slowly began replacing those labels with truths I heard God telling me through various sources: my daily devotional, scripture, Christian songs, Christian books, and prayer.
A few short months later, I sat in a second bible study, “Hearing the Voice of God”, with Rachael again as my leader. God wasn’t done breaking me free from lies yet! For one activity, we were given sheets of labels and instructed to write our false truths on one sheet and replace those labels with God’s truths on the other, ending up with one predominant label from God. I still wrote some of the same labels from before that I needed to tear down. In the front of the class, I literally tore them up and placed them in a bowl, declaring that I am NOT “unworthy” or “not enough”, and I declared my new label worn proudly now on my shirt: “Beloved Daughter of God”!
Since then, I strive daily to listen to my Father’s voice and realize that my true identity remains in who God says I am. During this same time, I was blessed in starting up a health and wellness ministry, “Faithfully Fit”, and I’ve led my group in similar activities discerning their truths and breaking them free from their labels in two different classes. I’ve also shared my story at a Mom’s Time Out group in my church this past fall as their guest speaker, relating how we may look healthy on the outside, but our inside could tell a completely different story. It’s not until we learn to balance all four components of our health: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual, with Jesus in the center, that we can truly be completely healthy.
Revealing my new labels was healing, and I keep them written in a picture frame my best friend gave me and on a seashell from another activity I did with my ministry, but most of all, they must remain in my mind and in my heart. Now I know my true identity as:
His precious daughter, perfectly designed, chosen, treasured, adored, held, His forever, famous in my Father’s eyes, beloved, uniquely gifted, dearly loved, wanted, treasured, free, forgiven, Child of God…..AMEN!
My dear friends, I pray you learn from my invaluable and powerful experience. Whatever you agree with, you give power to in your life. If you agree with lies, they enslave you. Let God speak truth and give you freedom from the lies of the enemy by consistently drawing near and remaining close to Him. Learn to recognize the lies or they will cause chaos and make it difficult to hear God’s voice.
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.” James 4:7
My mind is being retrained, or renewed to think His thoughts about me. My objective is to learn not to allow anything or anyone to control my mind but Christ. “Do not conform to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is-His good and perfect will.” Romans 12:2
The surgery hurt, but the healing has created something wonderful, and now I am remade with a new identity from God! “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” Psalm 139:13-14
Enjoy this song by Francesca Battistelli as one of the many ways God spoke to me to relay His message that “He Knows My Name”!
